Why we can't have nice things - Gym Edition

Posted by: Dena Mehling on Tuesday, January 19, 2016 Categories: |
I love my gym.  I actually was sold on it when I toured the locker rooms because I thought... this place is clean and I don't have to bring a towel.  That was 4 years ago and while, the staff does a wonderful job keeping it clean...  they're forced to contend with filthy creatures.  These creatures are called "Women".  
 
I know, I know, right... boys are gross.  I'm sure they are.  I don't have to go into their locker room but damn... ladies can be downright nasty.  Coffee grounds and olive oil in the steam room.  Leftover bottles of god knows what left behind.  Gobs of hairs on the shower sill.  Upstairs and downstairs variety.  Yup, true.  Shocker, I know.
 
So what happened today?  Well, I finish my workout and come down to the locker room. This gal I've seen before but don't know is also getting undressed for a shower. Ok. We all know about the locker room shenanigans but today is quiet and I'm keeping to myself.  I get undressed and toweled up and she does too.  We both walk to the showers and no big deal. I had no kiddos today so I'm luxuriating and taking my sweet time.  Blessed hot water.  *sigh*
 
I return from the shower and she's back in the stall putting her sweaty workout clothes BACK ON! 
 
 
Gross. I don't know about you but after a workout, my clothes are in no condition to stay in all day nonetheless put back on.  Like really, that's how you get a yeast infection for fuck's sake.
 
 
But wait... there's more. She lays all over her stuff out on the counter.  Obviously, she doesn't realize that's my counter but that's neither here nor there but she seems to get a little testy that people are walking past her repeatedly to get to the sink bank.
 
She fires up her phone.  I'm guilty of the same thing but I have discovered this nifty little invention called headphones.  I should show her what they look like because she fires up her phone nice and loud and starts with the podcast or talk radio news program about some random shit or who knows what.  Obviously, we all care what she's listening to.  I'm so much more knowledgable about Sean Penn's meeting with El Chapo and how the cartel has their own opinions on the state of affairs now.
 

And here's where she loses me.  She starts doing her makeup.  She lays a towel under everything and there's brushes and powders and tubes and pencils.  She loads each brush up and then... wait for it...
wipes it on the towel.  This poor towel has huge streaks of thick foundation all over it.  Only after she wipes the brush on the towel, does she use it on her face.  I'm standing there with my mouth agape.  I mean really... isn't that what the 17,000 boxes of Kleenex in the locker room are for.  Don't you do that after you use the brush and not before?  I wipe my Dena parts with those towels and you want to rub that on your face?!?!  I just can't even.  
 
I look at the towel and it's fucking disgusting.  She's wiped everything on there.  She's sharpened her eyeliner and left the shavings and then dulled the point on the towel.  She's wiped eye shadow and blush on the towel.  The towel is officially a crime scene so what's a girl to do...  Why wrap her wet hair up in it and get a fresh new towel...
 
 
I just can't even.  This is why we can't have nice things and yes... some people are just dirty.
 
 
 
 

1 comment:

  1. Great day at LT! And yes, that's why we pay out the ass and still don't get lotion in the locker room and this on our cardio equip, like the Parker peeps do.

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